Books: Middle Spoon and Disoriental

By Zach Shattuck

Middle Spoon by Alejandro Varela

Oh man, I wish I’d been heartbroken when I read this one.

Taking place in NYC modern day, the book opens up in the visceral first day of an unexpected heartache and breakup.

Heartbreak is a near-universal pain, yet the particulars of it are what make each rendition so engaging.

For Alejandro Varela’s Middle Spoon, the most stand-out particular is the method of narration: this entire book is a series of unsent emails from the narrator to (mainly) his newly ex-boyfriend as he navigates the devastation of love lost. This particular perspective slants the viewpoint the reader is given of the situation even more than a general first-person narration, as nothing happens in real time. We are left with the (perhaps biased) memories of encounters with others instead of the immediate, undeniable reactions between characters clashing as a reader is often given in the traditional first-person narrative. It’s a lot of fun and encourages the reader to read between the lines.

Another more unusual aspect of this particular heartbreak is that it is the first the narrator has ever experienced in his forty-odd years. Most of us confront our first devastation at a much younger age. Consequently, the narrator is more cognizant of himself and his impact on others.

“What you never understood was that my love for you was unique and unlike any I’ve ever experienced in my life, even for my husband.”

Here is the final set-it-apart factor: the narrator is happily married to his husband of over twenty years. After some discussions, the two agreed to open up their marriage and allow the narrator to explore his desire for polyamory. It is through this agreement which the narrator meets, and quickly falls in love with, Ben. Watching the narrator navigate his heartbreak is interesting because, for most of us, heartbreak is something we mostly experience alone. The narrator, however, wakes up to his husband holding him and asking him what he needs for support. 

Then there is the public logistics of being married and brokenhearted about your boyfriend: to discuss this with the average person in your life, they would need to already know that you’re polyamorous. Consequently, a significant amount of struggle in this book is that, for fear of judgment when he is seeking support, the narrator has very few people he can discuss his hurt with. 

This book is wonderful, dizzying in the array of topics it covers (from who has been snubbed by the Academy Awards to raising nonbinary children to structural inequality in the US to antisemitism and a Free Palestine), funny, and revelational. It also provides its readers with a happy ending. Granted, that happy ending really only comes through at the end, and most of this book is spent in the free fall of heartbreak and loss. But it is such an enjoyable read, even when you are side-eyeing -or are outright angry with- the narrator. I highly recommend this book.

There are around five copies of Middle Spoon available at San Diego Public Libraries, including an audiobook version, so pick up yours today.

Disoriental by Negar Djavadi

Here is a web of a book: a woman in love with her girlfriend sits in a fertility clinic with her beard, feigning a devoted heterosexual marriage in late 90’s Paris as she contemplates the miraculously complex lives of four generations which led her and her family to seek refuge in France.

Disoriental by Négar Djavadi is a fascinating and eye-opening book which unravels the life of Kimiâ Sadr, who was forced to flee her home with her family after her father was labelled a political enemy.

“In nine days, we would have utilized every possible means of transport, from the most ancient to the most modern, to travel the three thousand two hundred seventy-eight miles separating Tehran from Paris.”

There is very little on the author’s personal life found online (even in French, as she has been living in Paris most of her life), but both her author biography and snippets from a few interviews denote many parallels between Djavadi and Kimiâ, creating a unique intimacy in its reading.

This was a mesmerizing book, and I see why it won awards. You will travel a family and an entire nation’s history, winding your way to an end that ties the complex story together while warming your heart. 

There are only two copies of Doriental available at San Diego Public Libraries. Let yourself learn a life you have never known, artfully detailed piece by piece before you.